Overexplainer Should Have Been One of the 7 Dwarfs

I was going to link up with Amy over @PBJ Dreamer for another Gratituesday today...but I feel pretty grateful as it is. And these posts have been sitting in my queue for almost a month. Time to get 'em out there so that we can move on to other things...like Paris, oui?

In case you have been living in a cave or held against your will by leprechauns or kidnapped and dropped into a hole with a bottle of lotion, you know that I launched my new D&E website a couple of weeks ago. To do this, I had to have said website designed. I tried to do it myself once. It ended in tears and Shiraz. Then I tried to design it with Army Dad, who retired after creating all sorts of slick and dynamic websites for the Army. That also ended in tears and Shiraz. And a tiny bit of hard-earned education in writing code. So, I let my domain forward to my Facebook fan page until I started receiving emails from potential customers who didn't have Facebook accounts. I couldn't be all Facebook elitest...after all Mark Zuckerburg is sort of an egotistical prick and doesn't deserve to have my entire business on his site (and I'm not even Googling him to make sure I spelled his name right. Ha!). Even if it is free. So I emailed Monica to see if she could pull something together. Most of her expertise is on GoDaddy...which is not a problem for me...except that I am so over the use of sex in advertising and I think that Danica Patrick should have a little more self-respect...she is, after all, a supastar in a man's world. Why perpetuate the stereotype? But all in all, GoDaddy is a decent business with some proven longevity.

Except that my domain was hosted by Inmotion Hosting. I'm not even sure how I found Inmotion...through a forum I think. And it's very possible that the forum started with a thread about auto repair or candle crafts and ended with "and if you are looking for someone to host your website, I highly recommend Inmotion Hosting!" They very effectively redirected my website to Facebook for 2 years and they had 24-7 technical support. I had zero complaints. But Website Tonite is a product that is exclusive to GoDaddy. Hence, I had to transfer my domain name.

The process was a little tricky and it involved steps like getting an authorization code and calling an Australian IT company to get that code. (Although, it was tempting to keep my domain at Melbourne IT just to have 24-7 access to the technical support and their delicious accents.) In the thick of the transfer, I got horribly confused and was receiving emails from both GoDaddy and Inmotion Hosting. One Saturday morning, after receiving two particularly urgent emails requesting payment from both companies, I called the number at the bottom of Inmotion Hosting's email. They needed to understand that they were not going to get any further cash monies from Daisy & Elm.

And this is how I proceeded to make a complete ass of myself that day...

IH: Technical support. Can I help you?

Me: Yes, I received an email about my credit card expiring. Except that I need to transfer my domain name, actually. I am really very sorry. I love you guys. You have the best customer service and I've been really happy with you all...but I need to transfer out.

IH: OK. No problem.

Me: I mean...I am going to GoDaddy and I'm terribly sorry. I don't even really like GoDaddy. What's the deal with their lame teaser commercials where you have to go to their website to get the rest? I've never gone to the website...I don't like to be taunted. They are all about taunting over there. And I swear, if their customer service or technical support screws the pooch just once...I'm coming right back over. Which they are bound to do...considering they are all sitting around looking at life-size posters of Danica Patrick in a skin-tight tank top. That company has no self-respect. But alas, my web designer used their proprietary product for my website. I am so, so, so sorry I have to leave. Please make sure the higher-ups know that I am only switching because I absolutely have to.

IH: That's no problem. And...ma'am? This is GoDaddy.

Of course it is. Because I can't take 2 seconds to look at the from line of an email to make sure I'm doing it right.

My apologies across the board. I'm an idiot.